As Ben Roethlisberger has apparently learned little either from Letterman, Governor Sanford or Tiger or even his own previous experience, I offer a reminder and a humble piece of advice for, well, pretty much all guys. It doesn’t matter what your orientation is; if you have gone through puberty, this applies to you.
Despite what females may think about us, the male mind *can* be a complex thing. But they are right in one thing: For most, if not just about every man, it can get shamefully — or shamelessly — simplistic.
I’m not sure if many of us quite realize when it’s happening as it’s happening, but there’s no mistaking it once the libido takes over. Situations that you would normally see as some combination of stupid, lame and impossible when you’re thinking clearly somehow seem plausible and possibly great. (The examples vary from man to man, but I’m sure you know what I’m talking about, so you know what yours are.)
So, if you’re considering whether or not you should try to hook up tonight, date someone, find yourself a mistress (or a dozen) or even go out to a club to hit on college women more than half a decade after you left campus, you might want to do yourself a favor. It might save you some trouble.
Find a magazine, a video or a website. Lock the door. And have some “alone” time.*
Afterwards, reconsider what you were thinking about doing before. If it still seems like a good idea, then it probably is. And if it’s not such a good one but you still want to do it, then maybe you’ll manage a little smarter about what you’re doing.
*If you have any religious objections to my suggestion, then, well, God help you. I don’t know how you’re supposed to survive if you aren’t supposed to have sex outside marriage or take care of it yourself.
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An open letter to males everywhere
March 9th, 2010 | No Comments »As Ben Roethlisberger has apparently learned little either from Letterman, Governor Sanford or Tiger or even his own previous experience, I offer a reminder and a humble piece of advice for, well, pretty much all guys. It doesn’t matter what your orientation is; if you have gone through puberty, this applies to you.
Despite what females may think about us, the male mind *can* be a complex thing. But they are right in one thing: For most, if not just about every man, it can get shamefully — or shamelessly — simplistic.
I’m not sure if many of us quite realize when it’s happening as it’s happening, but there’s no mistaking it once the libido takes over. Situations that you would normally see as some combination of stupid, lame and impossible when you’re thinking clearly somehow seem plausible and possibly great. (The examples vary from man to man, but I’m sure you know what I’m talking about, so you know what yours are.)
So, if you’re considering whether or not you should try to hook up tonight, date someone, find yourself a mistress (or a dozen) or even go out to a club to hit on college women more than half a decade after you left campus, you might want to do yourself a favor. It might save you some trouble.
Find a magazine, a video or a website. Lock the door. And have some “alone” time.*
Afterwards, reconsider what you were thinking about doing before. If it still seems like a good idea, then it probably is. And if it’s not such a good one but you still want to do it, then maybe you’ll manage a little smarter about what you’re doing.
*If you have any religious objections to my suggestion, then, well, God help you. I don’t know how you’re supposed to survive if you aren’t supposed to have sex outside marriage or take care of it yourself.
Commentary relationshipsThis entry was posted on Tuesday, March 9th, 2010 at 4:02 pm and is filed under Commentary. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.